What Comes Next?

I wish my life were like this-



But it's a lot more like this-

I've got to stop repeating this pattern. I've got to be able to hit stumbling blocks without it becoming a catastrophe. I've got to be able to move forward, but truly to do that I've got to forgive myself for being human and imperfect. I've got to stop telling myself what I've got to do.

Let it go, Brandi. Accept yourself. Love yourself. It's ok.

Fire Drill

If you wanna know what this is all about you can go back and read this blog or just check out FlyLady's Beginner BabySteps.


Day 6: Hot Spots!

- Getting Dressed to lace up shoes
- Keeping our sink shining
- Going to Big Tent and reading messages
- Looking at our posted reminders in the kitchen and bathroom
- Recognizing the negative voices when you hear them and changing the words to be nice to you. That is what FLYing (Finally Loving Yourself) is all about.

Today we are going to learn about Hot Spots. We all have them. Here is a link on our website to read the definition of a Hot Spot.

http://flylady.net/pages/FLYFaq.asp#hotspot

Now I want you to set your timer for 2 minutes and lets practice putting out your Hot Spot. You don’t have to work till you have finished; just do what you can in 2 minutes. Put your bills in one place. This will keep you from having to search for them.

This is one of our worst hot spots:


Our coffee table is like the epicenter of our home. We eat here (no dining table), we use our laptops here, and we drop all of our junk here! And it's really hard to do all of those things there when it is usually covered with junk. So, we set the timer (yes, I said we because the hubs wanted to help) and two minutes later, this is what we had:
Seriously. Two minutes. For real.


Granted, it wasn't that bad to begin with, but it just goes to show that you don't need a lot of time to make a big impact. It is an area that is constantly going to be a hot spot, but I know I'll just need to spend 2 minutes and it'll be clean and clutter free!

P.S. Did you see that blue thing in the first picture? That's where I keep all of our bills/important info. like our monthly budget.

Big News

I have some big news that I want to share today. I'm a little bit nervous about sharing this information just because I'm not sure how it will be received, but I want you to know that I am full of joy and hopefully that will be enough.

So, it all started with a little trip to Salt Lake City...

On the last night of our visit, we finally made time to go visit Temple Square. If you are not familiar with the Temple Square, it is basically the epicenter of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (aka Mormon or LDS Church). We had driven around the square several times and were taken by the beauty, but we kept putting a visit off. It is all open to the public (except for the Temple itself). We really didn't know what to expect and just planned to walk around a bit and then go back and pack up to leave the next morning.

We ended up talking to two of the sisters for a while and Havie shared with him that he had grown up in the Mormon church. His mother was Catholic and his father was Mormon, so they switched back and forth every weekend growing up. When his mom passed from Cancer, he basically lost all of his faith. However, he had a feeling that night that he was supposed to return to the church. He asked the sisters to send missionaries to visit with him. They walked us over to the auditorium where we got to listen to the organist practicing. I have to admit that I was curious. I felt a presence and peace that I couldn't deny.
Havie asked me if I would be willing to look into the church with him, and I told him that I would. I had never seen my husband like this before, how could I not be open to learning more? I have to admit though, that I was very skeptical. I thought that I knew what the Mormon church was about and I couldn't imagine that I would be able to buy into it.

Fast forward a few weeks, and we were visited by two of the local missionaries. They brought such a message of love into our home. They dispelled some of my biggest misconceptions that night, but the biggest thing that happened was they asked us to pray. To ask God to let us know that the words they were saying to us were true. And they promised that if we asked with sincere hearts, we would receive a message. And we did.

The last few weeks, we have been immersed in the word of God. We have been meeting with the missionaries several times a week for lessons as well as going to church on Sunday. I've had moments of serious doubt- of fear. But I've also had moments of pure love. I've realized that this is my path, and we have set a date of baptism for the 19th of December.

I don't want you to think that I'm going to become some brainwashed ultra-religious person. I am still going to be me. I just have the greater purpose and path that I've always been seeking. I will be sharing some of this spiritual journey from time to time, but I will continue to mostly blog about the same things I have been.

If you have questions, I would love to answer them or at least find the answer if I don't know it yet. Regardless of your own personal religious inclinations, I hope that you can respect that faith is a personal journey, as I do for you.

Do you Hear What I Hear?

I was exhausted yesterday afternoon for some reason, and wound up taking a SUPER long nap. I woke up in a panic later than evening because I almost slept through the night without shining the sink/doing a bunch of other stuff I needed to do, but I walked into the kitchen and what did I see?

Well, a shiny sink! The hubs so sweetly decided to take it upon himself to do it since I was resting. Truly Awww inducing. I didn't even know he had noticed anything different was going on other than me asking him to keep his dishes loaded throughout the day and to dry out the sink when he was done. FlyLady said that it would rub off on the other people in our homes, and she was RIGHT! And now for yesterday's babystep-

Day 5- Write Down What You Hear

- Getting Dressed to lace up shoes
- Keeping our sink shining
- Going to Big Tent and reading messages
- Looking at our posted reminders in the kitchen and bathroom

Are you hearing any of those nagging negative voices popping into your head? I want you to take a piece of paper and write down what you hear then I want you to turn those ugly words around and say something nice to yourself to negate the ugly words that they said.

So, since I was actually looking for it, it was amazing how often I had those negative voices going on. I had every reason to be proud of myself yesterday. First of all, I showered Friday night and dried my hair which was an accomplishment in itself because I'm ALWAYS procrastinating eventhough I prefer to do it this way. My hair is easier to style the next day and I sleep better.

I got up early, for a Saturday, and had time to do my entire sticky-note list including make-up! I even had my hair completely down and it looked great! I should have had the hubs snap a shot, but I was running a tight schedule at that point and had to run out the door to be on time to the pageant. And that's where the negative thoughts began.

I ended up being a judge because no one else came through for my boss. I was super scared. I thought that I was totally unqualified for the job and my insecurities started up. As we were walking out to conduct the interviews, I caught the eyes of one of the Women contestants and her mother. They gave me a funny look and I immediately thought the worst. "They probably think that I'm too fat. How am I going to judge them?" Ay yay yay...

As we were walking I said to myself, "Brandi. Stop that. You look very put together and professional today. They are probably just nervous and wondering what you're thinking. Hold your head up high and be confident." And you know what? It actually worked!

So, fast forward a few hours after I woke up from the nap, and they started up again, but this time it was about the house. I got a reaming from my mind for sleeping all afternoon when I could have been getting everything on my list done. "Once again, here I am procrastinating when I know there's a bazillion things that need to be done."

This one was harder to squash, but I told myself over and over that I've made alot of progress in just five days and that while the house isn't spic and span, it is pretty clean. Most of the laundry is done, and everything else can wait. It will be ok. I don't have to be perfect overnight as long as I keep trying and moving in the right direction. Eventually, it worked and I was able to just go back to bed.

Keep your eyes out for another blog tonight as I have a very special announcement to make!!!

Write it Down

Today was an easy day! Not just because my FlyLady babystep was easy, but because it is already becoming easier to follow the steps that have been laid out so far. I know it may seem so simple to others, but for me, it's always been a struggle. This is exactly the kind of structure and love guidance that I've always needed. And I know I'm not alone because thousands of people are following this program too! Maybe it will help you too.

Day 4: Write These Things Down

So far we are;

- Getting Dressed to lace up shoes
- Keeping our sink shining
- Going to Big Tent and reading messages

Your next thing is to write these things down on a sticky note and post them on your bathroom mirror and above your kitchen sink. This is the beginning of your Control Journal. The little notes help us to remember the habits we are trying to establish.

I don't really need a reminder to check BigTent because I have it set up that everything is emailed to me and I make it a point to read the emails as they come. Sometimes if I don't have time, I go ahead and delete some of them. I do this because FlyLady says it is ok. I can pick them back up where I left off!

So, here's some pics of my sticky note reminders:

One in the kitchen

And one in the bathroom

And that's me in my bathrobe... ;) I guess you got more than you bargained for! LOL

Another Day

And Another Shiny Sink!

Day 3: Do What We Have Already Done

Today you are doing what we have already done.
-Getting up and dressing to lace up shoes
-Keeping your sink shining

Now is the time to start exploring Big Tent. Be sure and read the NEWS. This is where you will find the Daily Flight Plan, the essays and the testimonials.

https://www.bigtent.com/groups/flylady

Dressed to the Shoes! Still didn't get to the makeup and the hair is questionable, but it's still a big step in the right direction.

And I just can't get enough of the shiny sink. We are keeping it under control by staying on top of it, so it really isn't a big deal at all.

To the Shoes

I'm continuing to blog daily about my progress on my 30 before 30 list as well as Flylady's Beginner Baby Steps.

Day 2: Get dressed to "Lace-up" Shoes

"Today I want you get up and get dressed to lace up shoes when you first get up in the morning. This means fix your hair and face too. Shine your sink before you go to bed."

So, here's the deal. The whole "lace-up" shoes is more about SAHM's who are more prone to throw on flip flops, or slippers as opposed to "real" shoes. You can read the whole reasoning here. For me, this isn't about wearing "lace-up" shoes. It's about caring enough about myself and my presentation to put my best foot forward.

I have to make a painful admission right here and right now. I don't take very good care of myself. I don't bathe enough, I hardly ever style my hair, and I usually just throw on whatever is clean with a pair of flip flops. I'm sloppy eventhough that's not the way I want to be. I've just kind of given up on trying.

So, I woke up determined to complete this babystep. And it didn't come easy. First of all, I spent way too much time in the shower (which reminded me that I've always preferred to shower at night instead). So I felt rushed to fix my hair which led to a big hair meltdown- and I ended up pulling it half back with my bangs swept off my face, but I think it still counts as "fixed". Then I started getting dressed, only to find that my sweater was missing a button. Not to be deterred, I quickly whipped out the replacement button and sewed it on. That didn't leave my any time to fix my face, but the fact that it was clean was good enough for me. I was so relieved that I had Havie snap a picture before I ran out the door.

So, I had the nerve to be embarrassed about this picture for about two seconds when my brain said "Hold UP." This is a million times better than I look most days. Sure, I could look better, but I've got to stop beating myself up so much! I love this sweater that I got before my trip to Utah. I was so excited to get to wear is in SOUTH TEXAS and it matches my gray shoes! I honestly felt great and I think it showed because I got lots of compliments.

The hubs made dinner tonight because we had missionaries coming over for a lesson at 7pm. So, when I got home, I got to work on straightening the house. Dinner was ready by 6pm and we were done eating by 6:30pm... And this is what the kitchen looked like:

The hubs doesn't believe in cleaning as he cooks- lol. That's ok because clean-up was a breeze! I had the dishes loaded and the sink shined in record time. By 6:45, I was sitting down and relaxing waiting for the Elders to show!

I didn't have to do the whole shiny sink ritual again, just cleaned the sink out with the remaining dish soap on the sponge and rinsed it well. Then dried it with the towel we had been using all day. Then I Windexed the whole thing and voila! Shiny Sink!

I've gotta say- having a clean kitchen makes me really happy. I don't want to make myself seem shallow. It's not like that. It's more about feeling a sense of accomplishment. For so long, I couldn't figure out how to make any part of my home presentable. I still have a long way to go, but this is a really good start for me.

P.S. I listened to music for over an hour today in bits and pieces and I've gotta say that it made me really happy. I need to remember this! The not watching tv for more than an hour is going to be harder simply because the hubs ALWAYS has it on. Going to have to work on that.